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Insane NormalityDon't fit me in your form
For i'm far from the norm
Don't try to contain
All that's in my brain
makes us insane
"In a mad world,
only the mad are sane"
DreamsWhat wonders the imagination can bring
With opened ear and untamed eye
Dreams that we shall toss and fling
And float about towards the sky
By luminous light of thought
Day and night will awaken newly
And become what you have sought
To find your most distant Thule
Never letting go of that which we cherish
The spirit of innocence and truth
Why without it, what would we but perish?
In the darkness of lost youth
Memento VivereWhen we’re old and decaying
And our souls set free
Our limbs will become trees
And from out those trees
Our fingers form leaves
And from out our mouths
That will form into birds
And these birds will fly
To the peak of the sky
And sing songs that ring
That sift through the breeze
The CorridorCreak Creak.
The wooden steps beneath my feet as I walk deeper down the dungeons corridor. The light of the lantern above leads me, though I know not where. Brick laid walls are all I see, the dimensions seemingly coming closer with each step.
Turning and turning, lower and lower.
Haunting vibrations echo through my eardrums, as a shrill noise sends chills down my spine. Bellowing voices call out below, like cries from the depths of hell.
Further still, I venture.
My fingertips touch the bricks; a thick slimy liquid coats each curvature. A grotesque odor permeates through the ghastly couloir, getting heavier with each loathsome gait. Soon enough, I recognize it as that of sulfur.
Luminous flickering light reflect against the bricks, confirming the fiery sulfuric smell.
The light brightens into a blinding glow.
At last, I reach the end of the corridor. The light stands before me, and nothing more.
Grief of a GhostThe light I always imagined
The transportation I have longed
Have not come of this new state
What have I done to be so wronged?
All around me has not changed
The house I always knew
And the walls the same color
The air the same hue
Yet when I lift my hand
In front of my cold face
I see right through the figure
Barely a line left to trace
As I take a step, or clench my fist
I feel my limbs as floating gossamer
My whole form is but a mist
I never imagined it would be like this
When I ceased to exist
I hear in the next room
Cries of weep and woe
Familiar cries of my mother, my father
But never of such unequalled sorrow
Quickly I rush into the room
To see lament so loathsome
I place my hand on my father's shoulder,
To the shock I can't help but succumb
No touch have I felt
My hand has gone right through
As if nothing was there
Can this horror be true?
Loudly I call out his name
Doesn't seem to hear
I cry out, louder louder, still
Does he not know I'm here?
My blood houses the melody,
My skin the harmony,
My being the complete symphony
I am the creator and the created,
The art and the artist
Sounds creating a vast canvas in my mind
It’s painterly waves submit imprints
Increasing tenfold in sharp echoes
While floating and drifting through tandem thoughts
Stringed voices dance through my striatum
Overwhelming and audible, all I can do is
Compositions of no other kind inhabit and entwine
Makeshift life folds into misty transparencies
I’m never by myself
When I have myself with me
Finding a friend I need,
Who understands how I feel
Expresses what my words cannot,
Makes my unseen feelings real
Fills my soul with such richness,
Reaches in the very depth of me
Suddenly bringing me out of this melancholy,
Or giving it peacefully back to me
Walking through city streets,
This feels like home
Through these alleys I wander and roam
Painting on concrete walls,
Expressing the bitter and sweet
I know w
IllusionsHow crazy these delusions,
That arise in sheer confusion
For half-asleep it sets in my mind,
An eternity where thoughts are unconfined
Sense it makes when in this state,
But soon a reminder follows
A quick awakening brings reality, returns normality
To this half-deluded mind
As if to ever find,
Some sort of conclusion
What is normality, but an illusion?
FrostI am devouring chaos,
chasing it down with winter's chill.
Spare me your fingerprints,
summer's lovechild. Those knowing owl eyes
have me second guessing the wild churning
in my bones. You are the sleep that sweeps
my eyelashes, drowning me in my own daydreams.
When was it...
that you plastered yourself to my ribcage?
HomophobeWhat gives you the right? to tell them they can't love?
Who are you ? to prance around? they're not blessed from above?
They must FIGHT, to love someone.
But for you it's not so big.
They're at WAR with who they are.
So YOU can justify the way YOU live.
What's it matter, what people do?
It's got nothing to do with you.
There's no such thing, as heterophobe.
So, why discriminate?
People are born the way they are
the world burns, with so much hate.
Live YOUR life, leave them alone.
You're in the wrong, homophobe..
They say it gets easier.They say it gets easier.
They say lots of things.
How could I possibly forget about you?
The one person who knows me completely.
The one person who would never betray me.
The one person who smiles and sets me free.
How can time heal these wounds?
When each minute is a red, hot brand
Reminding me of the feel of your hand.
When every day is another empty room
And I'm losing track of the hours in this tomb.
Time becomes my eternal prison.
How can I go on without you?
I'm flying blind without you.
I'm deaf, dumb, and dead without you.
I'm putting a gun against my head,
And pulling the trigger without you.
They say it gets easier.
They say lots of things.
The Days of Your LiesToday was the first day of your lies.
The day you first said that you loved me.
You started as you meant to go on,
Deliberately stringing me along.
I was as blind as you hoped that I would be.
Today was the worst day of your lies.
The day you said you'd always love me.
But all that I really was to you,
Was a plaything - and I had no clue.
You showed me what I wanted to see.
Today was the best day of your lies.
The day you said there was no-one else.
The way your smile faltered that day,
Was the one thing that gave you away.
Then I saw you for your true self.
Today was the last day of your lies.
The day I told you we were through.
And even though all your sweet lies,
Painted an illusive paradise,
I know that I will never miss you.
He Loves Me NotA rose sat on the table,
He promised it would never die,
And when it was worn and withered,
I did not cry.
It's not what I expected,
I knew the rose would not grow,
Into a lumbering, majestic tree,
That in the wind would flow.
The petals fell, one by one,
Browned under the burning sun,
Scattered across the table and chairs,
Worn and withered without a care.
And when the rose finally snapped,
I let out a deep sigh,
The weight of the world,
Broke its' neck,
But I did not cry.
I already knew what to think,
When I saw your face,
But I learned how not to speak,
When it wasn't my time or place.
I played your little game,
And we had a bit of fun,
But now we're driving in the other lane,
And all is said and done.
My shoulders are turned in,
The petals fall from my hand,
The ocean washes them away,
Down on the sand.
I know this wasn't planned,
And it didn't last too long,
But it's hard to pretend,
That I am still strong.
A rose sat on a grave,
He promised it would never die,
And when it was wor
It swallows you whole,
Exceeds your control.
Apprehends your soul,
Until it has taken its toll.
It’s an overwhelming feeling.
That is made to be appealing
And you can’t help revealing,
The doubts you are concealing.
It’s an undefined dimple
And a well known jingle.
But only when you are single
Does it all seem so simple.
It is one of life’s many gifts,
That empowers and uplifts
And can lead you adrift.
Should you miss your shift.
It is impossible to describe it.
It is impossible to fight it.
Because once it is ignited
And once you have tried it.
It will take your independence.
You will become used to its presence.
You will become addicted to its essence
And include it at the end of your every sentence.
It exists even in the hearts of its haters.
It is a taste even they will savour
And although its duration wavers.
There will never be a feeling that is greater.
Everything I have said and more.
I am merely repeating what you already know.
A Letter to Lily, unsent*~Note: This is not part of "Forever and Always," it is a vignette in memory of Lily Evans, on her birthday.
My Dear Girl,
Well, you're married now, aren't you. I always thought hoped for a different manner of celebrating your 21st birthday. I thought it would be you and me, together, like the old days: celebrating your 10th birthday in secret, right at midnight, by our favorite orchard tree. Do you remember? The air was cold, but the winter winds carried promises of flowers and fresh life to come. And our eleventh birthday we celebrated our birthdays together that year, remember? We skipped Charms class and conjured cakes and little candied flowers. And I brought you a lily, and yo
I Love HerYou say this is wrong,
the work of the devil,
I never knew love,
could cost me forever.
It's not my fault,
I didn't ask for this,
I didn't ask to get caught,
caught up in her kiss.
It's not just a faze,
I've always felt this,
the need not for a prince,
but for a princess.
But you say it's impossible,
for me to feel this way,
I have to fight it, I have to battle.
But why is it that you; mom and dad,
your love is seen as pure,
but as for mine, it's seen as a sin,
just because it's with a girl.
You always taught me not to judge,
so why are you being so judgmental,
you sin too, you have your faults,
so why am I the one on trial?
God wont leave me because I love,
He knows it's not my fault,
so mom and dad do as you wish,
I'll love her if I want.
Lump Of CoalWould it bother you to hear me talk about boys?
What about other girls?
Well maybe not.
But the way you say.
You want a boyfriend.
Makes me feel like I don't exist.
Like I'm some sort of on the side.
That I'm not really here.
What am I?
Am I just a plaything?
Just until you can get a boy?
Then will I be thrown away?
Am I just a tissue?
To be tossed away?
When you're done with me?
It hurts to think that that's what I am.
But it seems to sound like it.
Because you say you want a boy.
What does that make me?
Are girls not the same as boys?
Well I know they're different.
But when dating, please treat them the same.
If you had a boyfriend, would you tell him.
Would you tell him about your perfect man?
I don't mind being your friend.
And at the same time something else.
But sometimes it hurts me to be treated.
Nine TimesI saw him nine times.
The first time we were both sitting in the room together, getting ready to take the math test that would determine our placement. I was scatterbrained and throwing things around, trying to find the pencils that I had known I would need but had still just tossed in my purse. He was lounging backwards in his chair, looking for all the world as though he didn’t have a single care in the world, including the upcoming test. It annoyed me, that I was frantic and ready to scream, while someone else could be that relaxed.
I tested out of the class.
I don’t know if he did.
The second time I saw him, it was a few months after I arrived on campus. He was the one rushing and frantic this time, running across the square. He was probably late for class, though I had no way of knowing for sure. I was already lost in my own thoughts and ideas, deciding on my major and convincing people that yes, this is what I really want to do with my life. If they weren
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